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  • Deeper than depression

     Rosa Calandra updated 2 months, 2 weeks ago 2 Members · 4 Posts
  • Anonymous

    Deleted User
    22 September 2021 at 21:56
    0 NTL Score

    During an Ayahuasca experience I relived a state I seemed to have before I was born. The state was best described as restless, impatient and desperate. Someone, who looked like she was my partner, yelled incomprehensible words at me: “You don’t have to go there anymore!”.

    Still I left that peaceful place and descended down. Determined to do something about that restlessness. Perhaps with the aim of fixing or supporting that what requires help.

    The initial idea I got was to fix something outside myself. To give help to the needy. But the assumption I had, of me descending to help by giving, changed quite fast once I heared my own voice repeatedly whispering: “I am here to take”. Out of my own control I whispered that sentence to myself over fifty times.

    Almost unbelievable but deep down understandable.

    Maybe I choosed this life, not because I have to, but because I needed to. To overcome a state that was deeper than depression in life, namely a depression in the after life.

    To do so, I feel, I am gifted with skills to analyse, a life-path filled with insights, surrounded by inspirational people and an open mind to sense new perspectives on ‘Why, and how, to better live in connection’.

    Recently I openly stated my goal to write a book about this topic. Mostly because I need it myself, I think so, but it would be nice if it can help others too.

    Although I will write the book in Dutch (my native language), I plan to give a presentation on the Black Sheep Community about the essence of ‘Why, and how, to live better in connection’ in English.

    Please let me know in the comments if you are interested in the presentation or the book and feel free to reach out to me if you like to get to know me. I would like to get to know other members too. 🤗

  • Rosa Calandra

    Member
    23 September 2021 at 16:08
    1123 NTL Score

    Sometimes it is necessary to open up to the surrounding world and even more, to be open, loyal, and true to ourselves. This always saves us and helps us go in the direction that most probably is good for us.

    The title is already strong and gives us an idea of what is going to happen here, and the words with which you describe your intimate journey are even stronger.

    Your skills and talents are the results of this inner dialogue that is constantly in progress, where learning & connection are crucial.

    Now, the book is the mission, and I see you moving forward with dedication and confidence! You have our support Maarten, and it is an honor to give you the BSC stage for that goal of yours. 👏

    What was the challenge of the Storytelling course?

    • Anonymous

      Deleted User
      23 September 2021 at 18:34
      0 NTL Score

      Thank you Rosa. I feel the support from you and Minke. The challenge of the story telling course was to look in the mirror better then normally. Because I feel that the black sheep community is a safe environment I dared to be vulnerable and tell my true story. Furthermore the story telling course gave me great insights and tips on how to write in an authentic and attractive way. What definately helps me in my writing process. So, I am very grateful and glad that I devoted my dedication inside this community! 😊🙏

      • Rosa Calandra

        Member
        23 September 2021 at 19:05
        1123 NTL Score

        We are proud that you can feel safe here Maarten, and develop in that sphere of your life that needs empowerment, thinking time, and connection. You are gonna make that book a reality! And it will be such a great accomplishment. Thanks for your warm words! 🌹

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