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  • Grades or uniqueness?

     Marion Kerkhof updated 1 year ago 3 Members · 6 Posts
  • Marije Tiesjema

    Member
    31 August 2020 at 15:05
    2 NTL Score

    Seeing my kids’ resistance to school over the past years reminds me of how I experienced school myself. How I struggled with pointless obligations, how my questions were often considered too far from the curriculum and how all that counted was the way you could reproduce the facts and techniques in the books.

    It didn’t matter who we were as a person and there was never enough time to dive into our personal experiences and fields of interest. The only thing that mattered were our grades because they would define our chances for a nice future. So I started doubting myself more and more, learned to keep my mouth shut and adjusted to what was expected of me.

    The result of this educational system is that a lot of adults have forgotten (or never learned) how to listen to their inner needs and uniqueness and as a result end up with symptoms of a burn-out (16% on a yearly basis) or a depression (5% in the last year). What a big waste of talent, energy and money!

    Like so many others I lost the connection with who I really was. All I knew were some superficial parts of the puzzle, but not the insights that really made a difference in experiencing the sense of belonging and satisfaction in my jobs. Maybe this sounds familiar to you too? Or maybe you also noticed your kids losing their interest and enthusiasm and painfully see them dissolve into some greyer version of themselves? You must have better hopes for them, right?

    We need to change this for the sake of our and their health and enjoyment of life, but also for us as a society to benefit from everyone’s unique talents, questions and insights. I’m still working on the how, but would love to connect with other people who share this vision. So who’s with me on this?

  • Hamza

    Member
    31 August 2020 at 17:30
    0 NTL Score

    I totally agree with you on this! School system teach each student to behave in a same manner as set by the system so there’s no room for creativity and individuality. They should teach students its ok not to be perfect!

    • Marije Tiesjema

      Member
      1 September 2020 at 11:39
      2 NTL Score

      Indeed! In my opinion there isn’t even a ‘perfect’, there are allways different points of view, nuance and room for discussion. And I think that’s much more valuable to teach our children!

  • Marion Kerkhof

    Member
    16 November 2020 at 15:35
    111 NTL Score

    I still agree with this even though I have no children, but I myself was a child where the standard school system did not work at all. I was also bullied because I was different and therefore got a very low self-esteem. I am still struggling with depression that I have had since I was a child and I have already had three burnouts. And now I am 41 and I am actually only really starting my life.

    So if there is any chance to lend a hand or a thought, as small as it may be, you may connect me. My motto is always if I can do it then I will.

    • Marije Tiesjema

      Member
      21 November 2020 at 13:14
      2 NTL Score

      I’m so sorry to hear about your sad experiences and how that still makes you struggle! Going through three burnouts is very hard, I know, I experienced that too. But if I understand correctly, we have both been reinventing ourselves. It’s never too late for a fresh start, right?

      For me the use of nature as a way to my subconscious has been an great help to discover my own inner nature. That’s what I am helping others with now, so they can discover their own uniqueness.

      I’m very curious what helped you get ready for a fresh start. And maybe we can share ideas about how to contribute to a more supporting way of education?

  • Marion Kerkhof

    Member
    23 November 2020 at 19:54
    111 NTL Score

    Thank you for your super sweet response.

    I keep inventing myself every day. I enjoy meditating and seeking peace. Sport is also important to me. Rest, Cleanliness and Regularity. If I am too restless I will color (mandala). And I also listen to meditation music or listen to an accompanying meditation.

    I am curious how and what you mean by supporting education? I know that many mistakes have been made with me. but in the past everything was different. You can always send me a DM here, just in Dutch, that’s a bit easier for me to understand.

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